We all talk about time. Time heals everything. Just give it time. Will I know when it is time? Exactly what is time?
The word time has many definitions in the dictionary. I like this one,
a nonspatial continuum that is measured in terms of events which succeed one another from past through present to future.
Time belongs to everyone. We all have a life of time to plan, build memories and grow from our pain. Time is yours to use however you please.
You can’t control your time, but you can make wise choices that will make time more productive. When you are facing a loss of someone, it is difficult to make decisions that will help you heal.
Time moves very quickly like the light. With every choice, you make big or small your life will continually change. You will not be able to hold tight to time.
If you hold time in a tight grip and refuse to grow and move forward the changes in your life do not stop. If you stay in your home and do not ever go out this will not stop time. It only alters your perception of time. You are still changing and growing. But you will not move forward.
If you have had extreme pain from a loss and someone says “You will heal in time” what they may mean is that if you continue to move forward, the pain will lessen. The choices you make to grow from this horrible experience will heal you.
The thing you want to do when you hurt is to hide away from everyone and stay in the dark. The light of day only shines brighter on your pain. And facing people who are alive reminds us of the loss we have had.
But to hide away will not lessen your agony. The darkness will not keep time from moving forward, and it will not prevent you from changing.
If only you could control time and move it backward, the loss would not have happened. You can not go back in time to change what has happened. We all know this, but when you face loss, this is a thought you may have.
It is like the definition says. Time is a sequence of events that succeed one another. It is not events that we can rearrange. Life is set up to move forward from present to future.
Will you be fine if you stay in one place and do not flow with the change of time? Probably not. You will not grow, and you will never be able to interact with the human race again.
You will have to grieve and accept the loss of someone you love. It does take time. You will heal in time. Time feels like it is standing still.
Each minute, hour and day that passes will give you choices. What will you do with your options? Will you face the pain and choose to go out into the light? Or will you keep the pain close to your heart and hide away?
As you ponder these two questions your life will continue to change even if you choose to hide away. Your heart will still ache. The present time will always move forward into the future. Make choices that will allow time to heal your broken heart.