What is a Drama Queen? According to the Merriam Webster dictionary, a Drama Queen is a person given to often excessively emotional performances or reactions.
And according to the Urban Dictionary, a Drama Queen is Someone who turns something unimportant into a major deal. Someone who blows things way out of proportion whenever the chance is given.
WOW! Does this fit someone you know? Maybe you know a family member like a brother or sister that is dramatic about everything.
Everything I am about to write is strictly my opinion. It is not scientifically proven or taken from a psychology book. It is just me speaking my mind.
Why is someone inclined to blow everything out of proportion? Why do people get loud and boisterous when confronted with change or problems? The drama stems from their insecurities.
Every Thanksgiving you have a big family gathering at your house. Your mom and dad, all of your cousins and your aunt and uncles show up for the big feast. And your brother Bernie comes every year too.
You look forward to the family fun and memories each time you gather. Bernie is loud and has a new girlfriend every year. Some of his girlfriends are nice, but they are usually just like him. Bernie always has a problem!
He turns everything around and thinks you are talking about him. He makes every conversation about him. He talks bad about all of his family behind their back.
Bernie always has issues at work. Someone is always against him. He bad mouths absolutely everyone. He doesn’t just talk bad, but he uses profanity with every other word he blurts out of his lips.
Bernie tells all of us he has anxiety issues. He causes his problems because everything is such a major deal. Uncle Bill was talking at one gathering about the year we all went to the ocean. Bernie was 13 at that time. Uncle Bill recalled how much fun we all had. And Bernie, being his dramatic self-got all anxious and upset because he thought Uncle Bill was talking about how he got lost downtown. Uncle Bill never said a word about that. The whole situation went downhill from there.
Why can’t Bernie just be happy with peace and harmony? Why does he have to pit everyone against each other to make himself the center of attention?
Bernie is insecure and prideful all at the same time. He is afraid he won’t make a good impression, so he gets loud and puts everyone else down to feel better about himself. He is too proud to get help or realize he is upsetting everyone around him. You can’t change Bernie. So how do you deal with the drama whenever he is around.
We could just pray he doesn’t stay very long or that he doesn’t come. We could decide not to invite him. These are not the right solutions and would only make things worse since Bernie is your brother.
We first need to understand why he requires this type of negative attention. All attention is good weather it is positive or negative. Drama gets the needed attention his insecurities demand.
It is important for the people around Bernie to not feed into the situations he blows out of proportion. You won’t be able to talk him out of his thinking process or change him. When he escalates into one of his fits or is talking about others, it is time to smile and walk away from him. He will then go to the next person. When everyone in the room does the same thing, Bernie will probably leave because he is not getting the attention he needs.
I make this sound easy, but it is not an easy thing to do. Someone like Bernie will push your buttons and make you angry. Just keep smiling and walking away until he leaves you alone. You can choose to feed the drama, or you can decide to walk away from it.
I may never understand the two faces of Bernie, and you can’t change him, but you can modify the way you react to him. You can change who you are when Bernie is around.
Bernie, The Drama Queen, is fiction. The Places, characters, names, and incidents are the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual events, locales, or persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental.