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I have been moved by the hand of God to write this poem and post. It is not that I want to tell my life story or have your sympathy. It is however that someone who reads this piece needs to know that the hand of God is always with them even when their eyes are full of sorrow.
Throughout this website, I have written poems that depicted the pain I have had in life. But there are so many poems on here you may not have had the opportunity to read them all. I am going to share pieces of my life and how the hand of God carried me through.
I have made many mistakes in my lifetime. I know that everyone does make mistakes, but I always felt I had a monopoly on it. I thought no one could have made as many as I. I was an abused child and I thought the abuse my fault. I married more than once, and I know that was my mistake. I feel as though I didn’t raise my kids the best I could have.
I can blame myself for so many things, but in reality, we all make mistakes. Once we have made the mistakes we can not take them back. However, when I made these decisions, I made them for the right reasons. I never sat down and said, “what mistake can I make today?”
You have to let go of the past and forgive yourself. When we ask for forgiveness in prayer, God is good a faithful to forgive us. He wipes our slate clean. This means if God doesn’t remember your mistakes why do you think it is OK to bring them back up year after year? He would not want you to punish yourself with the pain and sorrow of each mistake.
I had many a day when my kids were young when I didn’t know where the money was coming from for the next meal. I would pray and think God didn’t answer my prayers. I never thought it was because he didn’t love me but because I didn’t deserve his answer.
Someone reading this post feels the same way. You think you are not worthy of his love and time to care for you. But God says:
13 Greater love has no one than this, that someone lay down his life for his friends.
I would lay down my life for my children if they are good or bad. No matter what they have done in life I would die for them. Do you feel this way about someone in your life? Do they need to be worthy of your love? NO, they do not.
This is how God feels about you. He gave his only son, he let him die on the cross so you can live. God didn’t ask if you are worthy of this. He offered this love to you. You are worthy of his unconditional love.
When both of my kids were very young, someone harmed them. When I found out I was devastated. I remember sitting on the couch in tears, crying out to the Lord to help my kids and make it all OK. I didn’t think he heard me because I was in so much pain that I couldn’t feel his touch.
Are you in a situation where someone you love has been hurt. Are you in so much pain that you don’t see the hand of God. You have looked to the right and looked to the left, and you can not see or feel him. You need him, and you don’t think he is there?
God says to you:
“Fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.”
God says to you that he is always with you, giving you strength and holding you up.
There were many more troublesome moments in my life but to summarize these 3 situations tells the full story. Every hardship I had come from these three most difficult times and affected the core of who I am today.
What I want to say to you today is, when I was in the most pain and sorrow is when God was behind me pushing me on and giving me courage. I looked to the left and the right, but I never looked behind me. I was in so much pain that I could not feel him or see him.
Are you familiar with the poem, Footprints In The Sand?
It speaks of a person who did not think God was there and the whole time God was carrying that person.
I made it through all of it, and I am a living testimony today that he did take care of me just like he is taking care of you. When I lifted my eyes to heaven and pleaded with God, he gave me the courage to move on. How do I know? Because I continued to work and take care of my kids when we were all in pain. I continued to pray and wait for the answer. I never saw the answer because I looked in all the wrong places. I wanted him to fix everything, and he was giving me the strength to deal with it.
With this strength, I grew to become who I am today. God gave me the knowledge and emotions to help you through whatever times you are in right now. As I age, I can look back, and see where his hand was in my life. I now see he was crying with me and holding my tears in the palm of his hand.
My God is the same God you pray to today. He is with you and answering your prayers the way he feels is best for you. Trust that you will make it because God’s love is all enduring and forever. You are his child, and he will not forsake you.
I close now with Psalm 23 “The Lord Is My Shepard.” When I have a fear or feel lost, I repeat this and peace comes to me.
23 The Lord is my shepherd; I shall not want.
2 He maketh me to lie down in green pastures: he leadeth me beside the still waters.
3 He restoreth my soul: he leadeth me in the paths of righteousness for his name’s sake.
4 Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil: for thou art with me; thy rod and thy staff they comfort me.
5 Thou preparest a table before me in the presence of mine enemies: thou anointest my head with oil; my cup runneth over.
6 Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life: and I will dwell in the house of the Lord forever.