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You might think I am writing a guide that will lead to a better me. That would be nice if we could put how to be a better person into a guide to me and follow all of the steps.
I know I can not write that guide because striving to become a better person can not follow one set of steps. Self-improvement is a lifelong endeavor. It requires for you to take in all of your life, reflect on it and decide what you will change and what is to stay the same.
I know you had had moments in your life when you didn’t feel good about how you handled a situation. Maybe you said the wrong thing at the wrong time, which led to a double adverse reaction in another person.
That person was a good friend or a business acquaintance who no longer had respect for you. You apologized all over yourself and tried to explain it all away, but nothing helped.
You had to write that person off as a friend or someone who trusted you before but not now.
So, what can you do about a situation like this one? How can you correct a mistake like the one I mentioned above?
I am not sure it is correctable. It will depend on the character of the person you offended. They may forgive you or they may not.
How Do You Move On?
Great question! It is always hard to look at a situation knowing you did wrong and cannot fix it and move onto another time in life.
You will need to take an in-depth look into who you are and why did you feel the need to offend another person.
Are you angry? Do you not see eye to eye with this person and needed to make a statement? Are you lacking in self-confidence and blurt out things that you should keep to yourself?
These are only three suggestions, but there are so many more. It is up to you to look into you and figure out why you did what you did. And it will take some deep reflection and truth in your behavior.
What Will You Find?
No matter what you find, be prepared for it to be complicated. It is likely something you have put way. You stored it down out of the way so you would not need to deal with it. Maybe a situation that happened many years ago ahs caused you to feel insecure when situations arise.
Regardless of what you find, you have to deal with it. You may pull up a monster from the deep that has not seen the light of day for many years. It may rear its ugly head and fight the change you want to make.
Or it may be a quiet and meek little bunny rabbit that is timid and fearful of the light of day.
What is self-reflection?
According to Wikipedia, Self-Reflection is the capacity of humans to exercise introspection and the willingness to learn more about their fundamental nature, purpose, and essence.
How do you take a look at yourself to learn how to change you?
1. Ignore the situation and keep moving forward like you are.
If you choose to ignore the issue, you will never grow or change. Not changing will cause you to have conflict within yourself. Internal conflict will cause mental instability. One has to choose to take a look at themselves to heal.
Does this sound like the right choice? Do you want to stay where you are just because you are too afraid or too stubborn to accept that you may have done something wrong?
2. Look at yourself and decide what caused the problem.
You decide to work through the issue that you found when you looked deep inside. You pull it out and inspect it. What you may find is fear and an unwillingness to face the issue again.
Maybe it was something that happened in your childhood that caused this ugly thing to cause problems in your life today.
No matter how you feel when it arises, you will need to realize that the issue will not harm you today. Yes, it is causing low self-esteem and low respect for yourself, but it is not hurting you like it did when you were young.
Facing the fear may be one of the hardest parts of self-reflection. But when you know the pain and anxiety is no longer a part of your life, you will have the strength to work through it.
Take the situation apart one step at a time. Look at what happened and what age you were. Look at who caused this pain. Are they still a significant part of your life today? If so, do you have to face that person all the time or can you walk away from them?
At this point, it may need to get some professional help to work through this. But if you can take a look into you and see that horrible monster is no longer as big as it was when you were little you can then conquer that slimy morsel.
You can see that this part of your life caused harm then but not now unless you let it take control.
A guide To Me
I have given you the worst-case scenario to bring my point home. You can not stay the way you are. You have to choose to dig deep inside of you and find what you need to change.
Maybe it is a work situation, and you are always find ing fault with others, or you can’t seem to get along with one or two people.
A situation like these require you to self-reflect and determine where you will become a better person. How will you either change so you can get along or how will you accept that you are a decent person and have the right to walk away from a situation.
I cannot write a guide to me, but I can give you steps for you to take that will help you change who you are when it is needed.
Will the change be easy? NO! Change is always hard, but in the end, you will be a better person for having taken a look deep inside of yourself and used self-reflection to become a better you.
A post you may like to take a look at:
I love to hear from you and answer any questions you may have. Please leave comments and questions in the comment section below, and I will be back with you shortly.