Memories

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The younger days are oh so sweet. Do you ever sit and think about how it was back then. How young you looked or what you did when you were in your 20s? Do you think about the activities we were able to perform? Summersaults poem memories by laura blue water background with fishand cartwheels, running in tall wet grass and swimming in lakes?

Memories

I do think about the years gone past and the memories. I think about the times when I could sit cross-legged or run after a softball. But to be honest, I don’t think about that very often. But once in a while when I can’t run across the street or sit with my legs tucked under me, I’ll have a fleeting thought.

Where I am today is such a fantastic time even though I can’t sit cross-legged anymore. I can’t run much at all or jump rope like I use to do. But those are things that were. They were right then but not sought after now.

I am happy with the road I wander down now. This road boasts wisdom and lazy days in the shade. I have memories to rely on now: some good and some not as good. But today I can choose to walk away from regret and want to remember the good times.

Elderly

I have not reached my 70’s or 80’s yet. I see so many who have. The elderly may live at home after the loss of a loved partner or reside in a nursing home. They are sad and lonely.

Do they mourn what they use to have? They don’t know how to embrace what can be exciting about today. They hang onto what they use to have instead of looking at the brighter side of what they have now.

Declining health

They don’t move as fast as they use to and their body has changed with time. Their body has developed so many aches and pains that their mind is forced to think about declining health.

They may have high cholesterol, high blood pressure, diabetes or heart disease. As people age, they may worry about how long they have to live or wonder how their days will end. They have anxious moments of fear for what is to come. So many tend to focus on their health.

Don’t get me wrong. As you age, your health is an issue. But to use this as the center of attention in your day is unhealthy. To get the help you need and then move on with your day is more functional.

What is next

Often the elderly have raised their kids, and their grandkids are at the age of developing a life of their own. They have free time on their hands and need to fill it, so they dwell on what is to come and the fear of the unknown.

So many sit in a comfortable chair wondering what today will bring. When night comes, they are still in that same chair thinking how long the day was. Life moves much slower. The days are so long and lonely and depressing. They dread going to sleep at night because the nights are oh so long.

Depressed

I see so many older and senior men and women who feel they have nothing to live for anymore. I do understand that depression increases in the elderly but doing nothing only increases this sadness.

What do you have?

They have life itself, what God has given them and the memories of years past. Quite often they can’t remember the good times. They need you to help them build new memories. For someone who is in a nursing home or home alone after the loss of their partner, you are everything.

As a younger person, you can change the life of an older person just by going to visit. You don’t have to love the elderly or want to make the world a better place. You only need to give a few minutes of your time to lift the spirits of another.

Give time

When you spend 20 min with an older person, it feels like days to them. You build new memories for them to hang onto. You give them hope and a renewed belief in life. It gives them a reason to hang on for another day. Even if that 20 minutes is once a week on your way to dinner or to run an errand.young girls hand on an older mans arm

With your act of kindness, you will give their mind a part of the future. Often all an aging person can think about is how their body aches or how they can only walk with help today. These pleasant memories that you built in that 20 or 30 minutes will come to the front of their minds and overtake their obsession with how tough life has become with age.

When I say young, I am talking to all ages between 10 and 70. You can change the world of someone who has given up on life.

When I was working in the emergency room, we had a lady who was 87 come in with a grave condition called a dissecting aortic aneurysm. Her son met her at the hospital. I could tell right away this lady had spunk and a kind heart.

She was in severe pain but was still joking with us. We stabilized her, and she was ready to go to the operating room. She turned to me kissed me on the cheek and said: “I came in here ready to die, but because of you girls showing me love I am ready to live now.”
WOW!!! I will never forget how the care and love we gave to her changed her life.

Give life

You can do this also. You can touch the life of someone who is getting older. It took us 15 min to stabilize this lady and get her to the operating room. In those short 15 minutes, she decided to live.

Let a senior be a part of your life so they can watch you run and jump. Let them laugh with you and tell you of their good memories of the years past gone. Of the days when they made white roses of friends, skipped rocks on the water and had a wonder of butterflies and frogs.

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26 thoughts on “Memories”

  1. I am so glad that I stumbled across you and Dave. Enjoy your weekly blog. It is a bit difficult for me to relate to the ageing thing, because at age 86 I still think the world is my oyster. My wife and I work every day because we don’t relish the thought of sleeping under a bridge. I really don’t know what Jeanine and I will do when we get old. Guess I will work at my hobby of affiliate marketing and she can do her crossword puzzles. Some of your readers who are dreading old age might try what I did at age 75. Rode my motorcycle from Jacksonville Florida to San Diego California in 48 hours to qualify for the Iron Butt Club, or in our 70’s Jeanine and I flew our biplane to Oshkosh by following the rivers at about 500 foot – did it in an all-day flight from the Tennessee River in North Alabama, the Mississippi River Wisconson.
    Keep up the good work. You are helping people to live a more positive life. I know you recently retired, but the work you are now doing will give a long a blessed life. I wish you great success.

    • Oh my, Ray, I am so so happy to know you as a friend. There is so much I don’t know about you and Jeanine. I would love to hear more of your life stories. I don’t think you will ever age. If at the age of 86 you are not aging yet. I can see this clearly. thank you so much for your support. It means the world to Dave and I. You are always so positive and incredible. We love you and Jeanine.

  2. Hi Laura, the website is beautiful, compiling inspiration and good thoughts. The Memories post recalled me to recognize long time of human lives and many life-connects involve physical health, mentality, feeling, and relationship in families. Nuclear family style leaves seniors feel lonely. Asian country culture had ever been extended family and nowadays becoming nuclear family style more and more. It doesn’t matter of what styles, we young people, under 70 as you said, should give times with older persons. Small amount of time given to our grand parents, parents, older family members, or even other older is so much meaningful to them. I definitely agree with this idea and I need to take actions. Thanks for the post.

    • I do so want more of the nuclear family here in the US. It is a necessity. But you are right that we are young under 70. HA HA . Spending time with the elderly helps them but it also gives us a warm heart to know we made a difference in another person life. 

      You are so welcome. 

  3. This is such a great article I had to share it on my Facebook page. My wife has been in healthcare for 25 years now and started in nursing homes. Now she works in the OR at our local hospital assisting in surgeries but this post brought back some memories for me. I remember my wife taking residents home to our 4th of July cookouts and various other occasions. I didn’t realize it then but I do now. Most of those people if not all have now passed on, the things my wife was doing brought life back into her residents. 

    I remember asking her why she use to do that because she was responsible for these people when she brought them home and could not mingle with our guests all the time. Her response was they need this and someday we will too. She also said to me why don’t you slow down and take a seat to listen to their stories?

    Until now I never knew what she meant and I wish I did. My wife is awesome and I really think I missed out on something by not listening to her.

    Sure I’d sit down and hang out but my mind was always on hosting and what was happening around me. I’m 45 now and want to try and connect with some people that I may be able to bring life back to them. I am sure my wife will be on board since she still works at a hospital and helps everyone.

    Thank you for the eye opener.

    Jason

    • Oh Jason thank you so much for sharing this post but also for sharing your experience. I too use to be this way when I was young. It is hard to see the needs of a much older person when we are very young and we are invincible. 

      I do believe you are right. I bet your wife would be so happy to be a part of this again. Not to mention she will have such respect for you because of your maturity and caring heart. 

      You will be so blessed to listen to the stories of some of the people who live alone or in the nursing homes. They knew a time you can hear about first hand. 

  4. Your poetry is very truthful, inspiring, encouraging to name a few. Too many elderly persons spend their life away drowning in their worries, fears and declining health leading to serious depression. This poetic post is a reminder to the elderly that they are not alone and there are people who will genuinely show an act of kindness to them regardless of where they are in life. I am sure that they will appreciate this post. Thank you so much for sharing!

    • Thank you so much. I hope this post reaches the elderly as well as the young. To give of one’s heart to another in kindness is a great thing. 

  5. Hi Laura,

    This is the first time on your site, and I was taken back to younger days just reading your words.I don’t often think about those days, until I put on Elton John, and listen to his ballads.I am a senior myself, and I live alone, so I know some days spent on those nasty regrets are not so nice. However, I do as you are saying and do not dwell on them. We make or own choices, and I choose to think happier thoughts.

    I bowl in a seniors league once a week, and I know people tend to stay home as they get older, sometimes just because they fear of falling. So, anytime we can share a laugh,they have something to tell a friend.It makes their day!

    Thank you for such a wonderful post,Laura.

    Chas

    • There is no way for someone to understand what we lose as we age until they face it. We lose so much agility, youth, and speed. But we are blessed to replace it with a kinder heart and a softer eye. 

      Keep active my friend until the good Lord puts a halt to it. 

      And I thank you for stopping by to read and comment. It means a lot to me and your input makes a difference to all who read. 

  6. What a beautiful post! I’m so lucky to have my parents and grandparents close and they have each other. It breaks my heart to think of depression in the elderly. Do you feel like nursing homes offer activities and closeness that can help break up the day and limit depression? I certainly hope so.

    • Oh, Tama you are very fortunate. As for your question about nursing homes. Some are better than others. All are governed by the law but some do not always abide by the law. there are kind people in this world and mean people. And both types of work in nursing homes. 

      I am saddened to say that money talks. The poor have very little choice in nursing homes and the better off can go to a home that does have a better choice of activities. I believe this is one reason why it is so important for all of us to visit at least one person in a home and show them, love. 

  7. A beautiful piece, Memories are everything in life and they define you in your old age that why i love to live life to the fullest and create happy memories all around me and with people so i can have a happy old age thinking about the memorie i made when i was young. Though i have never thought of helping the old age but it never too late to start. Thanks Laura

    • Thank you Aweda, You are right it is never too late to start and it won’t take much of your time. I think you would be quiet amazed how incredible you will feel when you walk away from the home of an older person after spending only a short bit of time with them.  I urge you to please consider it. 

  8. What an interesting post, I think memories are all anyone really has and they can change your mood to good or bad depending on the memory they may be thinking about. I watched my grandmother decline into sadness and become lonely for the last end of her life because of my grandfather passing away. I can relate to this post, thanks for writing about this most important subject.

    • thank you for sharing this story. I too saw my mom slip into sadness because of the passing of my step-dad. she loved him so and wanted to be with him. I did get to spend time with both before they passed and am so grateful for those days. 

  9. Hi Laura! Your article is great as usual. In fact your write up made me feel nostalgic of when I was a kid and carefree. When I can spend the time anyhow I want without worrying about one responsibility or the other. Elderly people are often depressed when there is nobody to care for them, especially when they end up in nursing homes. It is our prayers that we age with grace. Thanks for your article on Memories.

    • Thank you so much. When I wrote this poem I too had a feeling of nostalgia. Oh if we could stary carefree forever. 

  10. What an excellent writing about life. I am from Thailand and my culture is very different. I had my first culture shock when I see all these nursing homes with the senior citizens live in it and once in a while a family member will visit them. I did not grow up with that. My grandparents raised me and my siblings. They were old but they do live with us. We as a family, do everything together. My grandfather who was 80 year old back then took me to see the race and taught me how to gamble lol Not a great thing to teach a child but I had fun with my grandfather. I wish he is still alive. I guess my point is, if you take care of your parents or grandparents, they will live longer and have a sharper mind. Just my opinion, I think we can all agree to disagree. But I for sure If I got old do not want to live in the nursing home.

    • I often think of places like Thailand and envy the culture of nuclear families. I was blessed to care for my mom in our home the last of her time. I did not want to put her in a nursing home. I will tell you this story but try to make it brief if possible. 

      My mom was very independent. But she started falling and taking the wrong meds. So my husband and I set our foot down and told her she needed to move in with us. We thought she would be unhappy but in reality, she was lonely. When she realized we wanted her to live with us she was ecstatic. We were trying to give her her independence as long as we could but that is not what she wanted. It was the best of times to spend every day with her. I do miss her. 

      Her depression lifted and she was so happy after moving in with us. And we were also very happy. 

      This is a perfect example of how depression in the elderly can improve with love and companionship. 

  11. The elderly tend to forget the good days mostly because of memory loss which is associated with age and not merely associated with depression and or because of lost of loved one. Though lost of loved one may contribute to it but basically is memory lost. Can depressions bring about memory loss?

    • It sounds like you have had a bad experience with an elderly loved one. Maybe Alzheimer’s? It is a horrible disease.

       It is not the memory loss that causes depression in the elderly. Although some brain atrophy can be part of the cause. It is a loss of companionship and love that can cause depression. A feeling of not being needed anymore. 

  12. I have always enjoyed reading your articles. It is really nice to read about someones life experiences. it gives a lot of maturity to me and others who are reading it. You have a great mind when it comes to sharing your experience.. Thank you so much for sharing your experiences with us.

    • Thank you so much for stopping by once again to read and comment. I appreciate your input and love seeing you here. Thanks for the amazing compliments. 

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