I met my husband 13 years ago. We married to the song Broken Road by Rascal Flats. It was and is the perfect song for us. We both had shattered dreams from the past. We wanted to mend that broken road with a new life. We have been able to do this but only with the help of our history to teach each of us how to build new.
Do you feel broken from your past? Not just from marriage but from relationships of any kind such as a child, wife, husband, co-worker, siblings. Any interaction you may have had with another who did not treat you well or abused you in any manner of life.
You were broken down by the things that happened. You have spent your whole life, maybe three years, maybe sixty years trying to recover from the brainwash you experienced.
You were made to believe you were not good enough or you were the cause for what happened to you. It has taken you many moments in life to turn your thinking around to believe you are worthy of love.
Then one day you see yourself as tall and brave. You have come so far and overcome so much. You feel like you are functional in life. You know you can contribute to society and touch other lives.
You no longer think of the abuse daily. Sometimes you can go days weeks or even a month without feeling inferior to the people around you. You have come so far. You are strong.
One day a person or a situation slapped you in the face. It set off triggers of being controlled by a narcissistic person years ago. It feels like a raging storm has assaulted your life. Someone has dragged you into the deep waters. You cannot catch your breath.
You start seeing yourself as you were long ago. Unworthy, guilty of causing the problem. Or you may see yourself as a child in your past. You may feel manipulated, and it reminds you of a past relationship. You feel the fear and pain from long ago. You feel like that previous person again, and you fear that whoever hurt you is going to do it again.
You worked so long, and hard to overcome your past. But now it is back. Have you lost the battle? You can’t go through it all again. You know you can’t bear to handle the learning and growing pains that come with starting over.
I am here writing this to tell you that you do not have to do it all over again. You went through it, and you learned. You have grown. You have become strong.
You have not forgotten what you have become. You are an overcomer. You are incredible. Stand tall and hold your head up high. You do not have to start over. Pick yourself and start from where you left off. You can continue to grow.
I am not suggesting you ignore the feelings. They are real, but they can not harm you today. The fear attached to those feeling is an old fear that you have moved past. Keep running this through your mind and remember that you are a different person today.
Brush yourself off from the fall. Let go of whatever happened that made you feel inadequate. Acknowledge these fears as old ones and move forward. Be proud of who you are and how far you have come.
You won this battle when you began to believe you are an incredible person and worthy of so much more. Don’t give up now when you have come so far. Pick yourself up today and look for the sunshine in your tomorrow.