How Good Is Your Life

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I ask you this question because so often we think someone else has it so much better than we do. People go around with a sad face with their lip dragging the ground with the “Oh poor me” attitude.How Good Is Your Life

Do you or someone you know always act like the sky is falling in on them because they don’t have as much money as their neighbor. Or their car is old with faded paint, but the girl at work has a shiny new car?

Have you ever considered that the neighbor next door might be filing for bankruptcy because she spends money she doesn’t have? Or did you think that the girl with the shiny car doesn’t have any retirement savings?

How good is your life? You have $300,000 in a retirement fund. You save because you choose to drive an older car. You keep your money instead of going out to eat and party every night. You made choices to better your life. But the outward appearance is not as sweet as some people you see.

A story about two girls.

In New York directly in front of Macy’s, there are two different girls. Neither one knows the other.

One girl has soft blond hair, smooth, silky skin, and a perfect body. Her skirt is soft and swirls when she walks. She has on a pearl white button-down top that matches perfectly. She sways gracefully down the street in and out of stores. She is so light-footed and agile that you don’t notice what she is wearing on her feet. You don’t notice the way she keeps looking around to see who might be watching her. She is afraid someone will notice her dirty brown, worn sneakers with frayed shoestrings. These are the only pair of shoes she owns.high top tennis shoes

The other girl has long mousey brown hair, and her complexion has acne scars from years past. Her shorts are worn thin, and her T-shirt is a dirty white with faded writing from her college years. She sits comfortably on a corner bench reading while she waits for her bus. There are people all around her, yet she feels safe and secure. On her feet, she is wearing a pair of $500 high top sneakers. Under those sneakers, she has perfectly manicured nails.

As you read the description of each girl, I am sure you formed a picture in your mind. Until it came to their shoes, it was unclear which girl had a difficult life. But life doesn’t always paint a clear picture of the life someone else has to live or chooses to live. How good is your life?

You may have envied the girl with the pretty skirt and blouse while you felt sorry for the one sitting on the bench. You compared your life to each one of these girls and formed an opinion base on your vision.

 

I wrote this piece one night while pondering how so many people think others have so much more than they do. If you look at the smiling face of another’s life, it would be easy to believe that your life is much more difficult. It would be easy to think that you were left out and someone else was blessed.

Social Media

Social media gives us a great example of how others can make it look like they have a perfect life.

When a person posts on social media about their children or their recent trip to the beach it seems like they have it social media bird on a wireall. It is easy to let the world believe you are doing well when your whole world is falling apart.

The person who just got back from the beach didn’t tell anyone she spent three days in the hospital detoxing from alcohol. Her drinking problem is a secret, but her beach vacation is not.

Anyone can make another believe that they are happy all the time. If a girl on social media posts that she has the perfect husband will you compare it to your marriage? What she didn’t include is that he yells at her all the time when they are at home. He is mean and treats her with disrespect.

Do you see what I’m saying? You can’t look into their life, and you don’t know what it has been like for them.

Untruthful appearances

You can not compare yourself to situations you see around you. People are often not truthful with themselves because the truth is hard for them to face.

Everyone forms opinions based on the surface appearance of others. It is hard as humans not to create comparisons. Next time you find yourself thinking that someone else has it better than you remind yourself of your blessings and make a list. Look back on this list when your bottom lip is dragging the ground because you don’t think you have what everyone else has.

A reminder, A mask

I wrote this poem for you. Save it to your photos and revisit it often. Each time you do, it will remind you that surface appearance cannot be trusted.

2 faced mask

Many people cover up their scorched and withered grass with a mask. Their mouth smiles but their eyes are sad. You don’t know what type of sadness others have seen. Their private life is withering away, but no one knows. Inside they are in turmoil, and they live with shattered dreams.

Be careful that you do not envy another and wish for a life like theirs. Just how good is your life? Take a look at your life. It is much better than you originally thought.

I hope you can see how blessed you are. If you have any questions, please leave a comment. I am here to assist in any way I can.

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28 thoughts on “How Good Is Your Life”

  1. Hi Laura,
    I totally agree with you that life can be deceitful in outward appearance, we only need to be truthful of whom we are and hopeful of what tomorrow can bring.
    This is a wonderful post and really inspirational.

  2. You spoke this so well. It was very clear and accurate. I remember recently seeing on LinkedIn a picture that had been shared. It showed an iceberg sticking out of the water. It said something like: success, money, and wealth.

    Underneath the water another list of words were shown with a much larger mass of the iceberg. They were things like: loss, multiple failures, rejections, mockery, and many more.

    In reality it was clearly saying people only see what they want to see, but it took work for you to get to where you are. It was “not all sunshine and rainbows.” It took work. So to me people can place a mask over other people and not even realize it at times. We are not the only ones to put on masks, but we will put masks on others too.

    • Oh Jake, thank you for this perspective. I had not thought of it this way but you are so right. And thank you for visiting my website. I appreciate you so much.
      I have seen that picture you talk about with the iceberg. It does take work to make a way for yourself. So many people think it is all magical.
      Laura

      • i have been enjoying reading your articles that you post. I can easily see that you are half glass full type of person just like me. But since I struggle with depression and anxiety since I was injured last year I have been enjoying your writing style, which helps me remember who I a used to be and who I can still choose to be today. I do not want to wear a mask.

        I remember how Facebook shows people I even know in the past appear to be doing very well. In reality they were struggling in many different things. I know sometimes the truth hurts, but it is my opinion that faith in the truth outweighs the lie.

        Wearing a mask and giving an untruthful appearance does not benefit us. It behooves us to show the truth about how we are doing, who we are, and what we are feeling. It does not mean we have a right to be mean or wicked to others, but we can use our words and thoughts more carefully.

        • Jake, Thank you for being such a supportive follower. You are right. To help others and to be honest with ourselves we have to be transparent. If we put on a mask and pretend like all is well we will not grow nor can we help others grow. I know depression can be hard. I encourage you to keep pushing through just as you have been.

  3. There is so much truth in this article and I love the poem you wrote! Simply beautiful! It does no good to compare our lives with the lives of others because, as you said, masks can cover the scorched grass!

  4. So basically what you’re saying is that two girls have a somewhat different, not only fashion sense but the financial problems itself. Two sides of the same coin don’t always seem what they appear. And all this talk about a mask behind their personally proves what their thinking. All in all, to stay your character is itself a blissful life.

  5. Hi Laura,
    I think you have shared a beautiful truth that will help many people. You cannot judge a person based on appearances… and social media absolutely is a liar! People put their best faces forward, but do not mention the bad things. It is not healthy for people to compare themselves to others based on what they read on social media.

    Amy

    • Amy, you are absolutely right. It is like I mentioned to a reader earlier, it is OK not to air everything on social media but don’t get caught thinking everyone has a better life than we do. thanks for your input and for sharing.

  6. Hi Laura,

    I established at a very young age to not judge others in any way, I wouldn’t want to be judged so who am I to do it.
    I’m not at the best place right now, my situation is well below average but no one would ever know. If they knew they would be shocked. I don’t show it, I don’t complain and keep it to myself it’s my business.

    I always say to be kind to everyone because you don’t know what they may be going through. I live it myself and always remain positive. Your article was an interesting read, I really enjoyed it. You have great examples.

    Patsy

    • Patsy, so many people don’t follow your great standards. It is OK to not tell everyone what your situation is. The thing that makes life rough is when others compare themselves to you and think they have it much more difficult. We never know what another is going through in their life. It is always best to know our own blessings without comparing to others.
      Things will improve for you because you keep a positive mindset. That is a key to moving forward in life.
      God Bless you Patsy

  7. Hi Laura, a great article thank you for sharing.

    The grass always looks greener on the other side and it is normal for people to make comparisons and envy others.

    However, as you quite rightly say outward appearances are just masks people wear and hide the reality of what’s really going on inside them.

    I have friends who despite having more than probably 90% of the world’s population still walk around like they have nothing.

    I have to keep reminding them how lucky they are and we should all count our blessings and always live with an attitude of gratitude if we want to have a peaceful and happy life.

    Great site… keep up the good work!

    • Moni, It is a normal part of our lives to make comparisons. If we can overcome this and keep a positive mindset like you said we will have peace and a happy life. Keep reminding your friends and one day they may see how blessed they are. Feel free to share this with them if you believe it will help. Thank you Moni.

  8. So powerful, it really moved me. Indeed, we compare ourselves with others and we linger with the hope to have what others have. I think it’s in human nature.
    Thank you for a great reading, Laura.

    • Dany, you are right it is human nature. If we can get past this nature we will be happier and more successful in life because we are focusing on our forward movement and not someone else’s. I am so happy you enjoyed this article. Thank you.

  9. We all need that reminder at times thank you for being the one to do it . You do a great service bringing this website to peoples lives . Never stop!

  10. Thanks Laura. Honestly, I could not hear this enough as a reminder. At times, I just get frustrated, but then I stop and think, I’ve got a great life! It’s true when we stop comparing ourselves to others and just live, life is wonderful! Keep it up.
    Cheers -JB

  11. So true! It’s so easy to compare our struggles with other people’s high points. I fall into this trap all the time, but I’m getting better at avoiding it. I always try to be as genuine as possible on social media. For example, I might post a beautiful beach picture in the Philippines but talk about how difficult it was to get there and all the delays we had. I try to show the good and the bad without getting too personal on social media.

    • Mariah, Keep working at not comparing yourself and you will get better. None of us can accomplish this all the time but if we keep ourselves aware of it we will get better. That is good you do this on social media. Don’t get caught in someone else’s trap.
      Thank you for your comments. If I can help in any way please let me know.

  12. Awesome post. “Keeping up with the Joneses” can absolutely ruin the middle class. That’s why I’ve really been resonating with minimalism principles over the past year. I’m tired of wanting to buy things I can’t afford. I’m tired of feeling like there is never enough. I want to embrace the beautiful life I have been given! Thanks for your thoughts on this.

  13. Hey Laura 🙂 Another great article I must say! This is so true. You never judge a book by its cover. You just don’t know. I’ve said this so many times. You don’t know what someone’s life is like based on what they have or appear to have. I’ve always said that it’s not how much money you make but how much you get to keep. True, right?
    Everyone should be grateful for what they have and not be concerned what others “have.” Thanks for a great lesson Laura! 🙂

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